Archive for May, 2015

Untitled poem

Posted: May 31, 2015 in Uncategorized

Lasting so long
Without giving up
Even though from
Starting in the 3rd month
I wanted to end it
But I’m not weak
I lasted pass
What I thought was
My breaking point
So many times
I wanted to quit
Doing the job
That I hate
I even pause
Looking for what I  love
Because I was so drain
All i wanted was
To rest after work
But instead
Having to deal with
Stress from home
How can i pursue
What makes me happy
When I’m being
Attacked from all sides
When i finally end this thing
I finally will have enough time
To fix myself
A set better goals
Maybe even put my
Foot down at home
I don’t need to be fix
I have no other choice
But to fix



Posted: May 31, 2015 in Uncategorized

I’m planning to doing something I find scary because it’ll be my first time. But I have to do this for my personal growth. I’m very unhappy where I am now, and I’m the only one who can change it.
I work full time hours yet paid part time. I put my all into and it’s slowly sucking me dry. I’m running on my last leg, so i have to end it. I’m going to try to last till the end of the summer or past October before I end this miserable chapter.

Poem: dying

Posted: May 9, 2015 in Uncategorized

No time to rest
And yet i feel
I must push thro
Even though my vision
Has become blurry
My body is so
Heavy and tired
But I’m not allowed
To take a breath
I must go
Pass my human limits
Even though my hands
Are shaking
I must not
Fight back
Even though I realize
I’m trap
Any will power
I have left
Is slowly draining
As my brain and heart
Are trying to keep me
From the hospital
My body is nothing more
Than a tool
But everything is hurting

In this home
I will never heal
Enough to live
Pass the pain
In my bones
Yet i speak about
This feeling to them
For they all will deny
that I’m reaching my end
My body is breaking
My mind surely is trying
But I can already
Feel the cold nothingness
And see the blur
Of no reality

I already have
Lose consciousness
Over and over again
More than enough
During this year alone
But I can’t speak up
Because the dramatize
Won’t admit
Their wrong doing
And so the thing
They so easily pushed so far
Is reaching her
Very end

Even though this was
Never meant to
Be so soon
How will she
Regain consciousness
Once her soul
Has pass the finish line
And her mind
Wipe clean from excised

But no one
Would even care
Once she is finally
Put out of her
Living nightmare